Twelve High Chicks is proud to be sponsoring Weekend of Kink this May long weekend.
We’ve said it before and we’ll say it again, stoned sex feels great and science agrees. But what about vaping beyond vanilla? Is it a good idea to play while smoking pot?
Yes! And no.
…It depends.
Be a Know-It-Enough
We’ve all been warned against hooking up high, and mostly ignored the warnings, but kink under the influence adds layers of concern even beyond the layers of concern (RACK/SSC, limits, safewords) that are fundamental to responsible play. Participating in BDSM while stoned requires a host of caveats that boil down to building knowledge: know yourself and your partner, know your bud, know your scene, and know how all those things react together.
If you’re a regular reader of Twelve High Chicks you’ll recognise the need to know your bud — each unique strain can have different effects on different people. So don’t try a new strain with a new kink. Know how you’ll get high before you get down.
Scientifically Sexy
Stoned sex is different than sober sex, obviously. Pot ups dopamine levels and dopamine makes life awesome. Marijuana increases our brain’s reaction to sensations — one joint doesn’t make an hour last for three, for instance, but it feels that way — so touch feels more intense and the entire sexual connection can feel deeper and more meaningful.
Sounds great, right?
It is. But BDSM, especially the SM part, has a lot to do with increasing sensation already, and not all of it ‘feels good’ the way a backrub or a kiss does. As well as the feel-good chemicals, oxytocin, serotonin, and dopamine, created from a positive emotional and sexual experience, kink highs are from endorphins released by causing pain. Take away the pain, as pot can do, and there’s less pleasure — take away the pleasure, as too much pain can do, and there’s no point. It’s a balancing act.
Beginner’s Luck
When mixing play in with your pot, the hands are a top‘s best tool; you can tell the amount of pressure you’re using, how hard you’re contacting, and how your bottom is reacting through your hands because they’re just as sensitized by pot as the rest of you is.
Sensation play such as dragging feathers, fur, ice or heat over the skin is already a great way to start a sober scene, when you’re stoned it can help gauge where each partner is in their high and when it’s time to move on. Talk to each other. When you’re stoned isn’t the time to be stoic: if something isn’t working, stop!
When you’re both feeling good and ready, add a little endorphin to your dopamine. Fingernails, tickling, teeth and ‘safe’ implements such as Wartenburg wheels are great ways to direct your dopey brain to what you really want to focus on.
Stepping It Up
Whether you’re adding pain to your pot or pot to your pain, start slow. A spanking, for instance, that feels fantastic when sober may feel different while stoned, but no one can say how the two differ until they experience it for themselves. Increased sensitivity can mean a gentler spanking is better, or it can mean everything feels stronger so a spanking needs to be harder to feel as good. You might want a favourite spanking utensil used or you might hate stoned spankings, and that’s okay to discover too.
That time dilation can also cause issues for the top doing the spanking: how long since the last swat? How hard was it? Do eating chips and giving a spanking go well together? (They do not go well together.)
Now What?
So you started slow, you know how stoned you are, you know how stoned your partner is, you’ve played hands-on, and now you want to stretch out. You have a favourite intense toy you’re sure you’ll love when stoned. Maybe your partner has always wanted to try something and needs to be a bit more relaxed first. So go for it. Marijuana is not a personality-altering drug: people who enjoy kink and being stoned will find the right stoned scenes for themselves through carefully experimenting.
Finally, remember that too stoned to understand means too stoned to consent. And consent is key.
Consent, communication, and cannabis…have a great high.
